I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that “reaching my potential” must imply that I must go outside myself and do something that society considers to be good/right/successful - within this I have not considered/taken into consideration/into account that what I am in essence doing is trying/attaining/attempting to be and become something that society has considered to be "winning in life" - not seeing, realizing and understanding that it was never about what society has considered/taken into consideration/into account how/why live should or shouldn't be lived - because it was I who had made the choice/decision to project/place Life as this game that I must continuously "reach my true potential" - therefore, I have assumed/perceived that Life was this maze that I must finally break through to be and become the winner, to be and become the apparent good/right/successful person that didn't exist in the first place, and so Life has been this maze to finally reach to the end as fast as possible to beat all the other mouses at their own game - I see and realize that continuing to exist as an idea/belief of what someone else assumes and perceives to be life is completely ludicrous, because I am here and thus I do not accept or allow myself to continue "reaching my potential" as some sort of reason to live here within and as this physical reality - therefore - I am compromising/abusing/sabotaging myself here within/as this life - because the potential is here/has always been here in every moment and of every breath that I take in here as self-awareness within and as this physical reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself accordingly to how much society has general considered/taken into consideration/into account on a mind-level what "reaching one's potential" implies here within and as this physical reality - within this I would look outside myself in general at all the apparent good/right/successful parts/aspects that society has placed/mind-projected to be and become Life, and so when/as my Life didn't reflect what society apparently wanted/desired me to live as, I would immediately/instantaneously assume/perceive that "I am a complete failure" - not seeing/realizing/understanding that my entire starting-point was an idea/belief of what the collective as society has assumed/perceived to be worth Life, to be worth living, and so my world/reality would inevitably fall upon itself to in fact realize who I am/have become - I now see, realize and understand that "reaching for my potential" has only been reaching for some result/outcome that manifested similar to what society has assumed/perceived to be and become Life, to be worth living, and so I allow myself to stop and breathe - I realize that I AM A PART OF SOCIETY - thus I am fully and completely self-responsibile to placed/mind-projected Life to be this consistent polarity outflow when/as I am getting a certain result/outcome - therefore - I allow myself to stop and breathe - I realize that the solution/outcome is here as this breath - I do NOT accept or allow myself to live my life "reaching for my potential" - but instead I allow myself to realize/investigate/understand within and as myself how/why I've lived my Life always trying/attaining/attempting to win something that only involved a momentary energetic experience that in actuality has never/will never be able to be the potential for everyone to live here as breath in self-awareness in every moment of every breath.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that I do NOT have to reach my true potential but instead I just can allow myself to continuously reach possible potential that only ever involved being and becoming some winner in this Life - because when/as I am actually being self-honest in the moment/breath/chance opportunity/potential that is actually real/valid, I can absolutely see, realize and understand that it always involved what I will get out of the solution/outcome - within this I react in complete FEAR of actually no longer playing the winner/loser game, because I actually take a thrill in all of it - I enjoy some people winning or losing - not seeing/realizing/understanding that when/as you have some people that win or lose - you have those in complete atrocious situations - to carry out the polarity - because at the end of the day the whole win or lose the game of life was only considering/taking into consideration/into account those with money in their pockets to be able to play the game in complete repetition until we die and continue the Game of Competition/Survival for generations to come - All because of what? Me winning something? Yes - winning the game of my continuous enslavement/limitation and those suffering in my name - all because I wanted/desired to continuously live in bliss.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that "reaching for potential is justifiable/excusable - because of wanting/desiring to live my Life winning the prizes that I was throughout my Life to do everything in my delusional power to attain in the end - I now see, realize and understand that I am setting myself up to lose - from the perspective of not considering/taking into consideration/account those in my name that never had the chance/opportunity to even Create - because I have created Life as something to "reach for," within this I have not understood/realized/investigated what it means to actually have the potential/opportunity to Create in the first place - to be and become the Creator of my world/reality to actually live the opportunity/potential that is here in every moment of every breath - What are WE waiting for?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe and perceive that the Life I am currently living is worth it in the first place to separate myself from my fellow brothers and sisters here in this world/reality for a momentary energetic experience to win something that only existed within and as my mind - in an idea/belief that I will solve anything - I now see, realize and understand that living in complete ignorance to what I am currently creating can actually be worth it in the end - not seeing, realizing, understanding the actuality of the manifested consequences I am currently creating within and as this world/reality - because I have limited/enslaved myself to ACTUALLY limit/enslave myself by/through "reaching for something" - within this I am only reaching for a delusional idea/belief of what it apparently means to live here within and as this physical reality - I see and realize that the only way I can actually reach for something is to reach within and as myself to change myself here as breath as self-awareness - taking self-responsibility for hiding behind my self-responsibility to actually be and become someone that actually cares about Life to in fact have compassion for those here - because I sure as Hell would want the same thing and not in the name of winning something that never existed in the first place but in the name of Life.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to Honor Life/Myself, Respect Life/Myself and Trust Life/Myself - but instead believe and think that "reaching for something" is somehow a Life worth it to be living - I now see, realize and understand that the only Life that is worth to be lived is here as breath in this very moment - NOT an unconscious collective of society creating all these assumptions and perceptions to live a certain way - therefore - I take a step back and allow myself to take a deep breath - to realize/understand/investigate that everyone has a choice/decision that is a part of the Elite, and so every person that is part of the Elite has to make the choice/decision for those that have absolutely no choice/decision but to remain waiting over and over for someone to finally stop reaching for something - to in fact reach inside ourselves the Honor, Respect and Trust that we can give to ourselves and those suffering in our name in every moment of every breath to how we choose/decide to live here in this Life.
To Be Continued...
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ReplyDeleteHello and oh what a breath of fresh air..sigh, I thought I was the only one out there who had climbed out of the box looking around wondering what was next..it is a bit odd when you have lived your entire, well half of your life following social conventionalism to then open the lid and then tear the box open to see that there is indeed something else out there worth living, breathing ...and being.."yourself" It was wonderful reading you.
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