Saturday, August 25, 2012

Day 36: What Does It Mean To Be Alive?

This is a continuation to Day 35: What Have I Done To Myself...
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think because I always assumed/perceived that there was something to search for/find out - within this I would participate in thoughts and see it as myself rationalizing everything out because (apparently) I cannot understand something in one moment by/through just being here breathing because obviously when I'm actually here within and as the physical I'm able/capable of understanding/comprehending everything very clearly, and so when I'm in my mind trying/attaining/attempting to search for/find out something I'm actually have multiple dimensional shifts because it takes multiple tries for me to understand/comprehend the information to the extent that when it is understood it is on a regurgitated level because I'm merely shoving the information within and as my mind to not in actuality see if the information is even supporting what is Best for All - therefore - when/as I'm perceiving/assuming that thinking assist/supports me to understand/comprehend a piece of knowledge/information I'm in actuality not even debunking the information that I'm regurgitating to remember to in essence understand how/why something can be realized in common-sense - to in-fact see, realize and understand that there is pieces of information that are immoral to Life, wherein - others just need to be actually lived within and as practical-application because shoving tons of information/knowledge within and as my mind in the end allows me to be some zombie because in the end I'm shoving shit that I'm not even self-aware of that is now in my unconscious-mind because I did not take the time to de-construct what I'm actually learning in the moment - therefore - when/as I'm (apparently) learning something I'm actually being and becoming very stupid because I wasn't even considering/taking into consideration what I'm actually learning in the first place, and so I wasn't even learning in the first place for all what I was doing in the first place was abdicating my self-responsibility to educate myself about this world/reality into and as knowledge/information to understand what is best for all life -  in this I will be able to educate myself about knowledge/information to effectively understand when something isn't pro-life or destructive, and so in the moment when/as I'm reacting to some piece of knowledge/information, I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back here - I now see, realize and understand that a piece of information doesn't have to be something bad/good because I understand that polarity leads to ignorance, and so I allow myself to understand that what doesn't work for an Equal Money System for all to have a dignified life doesn't mean anything bad/good but another point that needs to be taken into consideration so we don't continue making the same mistakes - I commit myself to be humble when/as I see a piece of information that doesn't support all Life because it allows me to educate myself to debunk information/knowledge within and as common-sense to learn what is best for all Life because all throughout my Life I have learned to not ask questions and remain shoving pieces of information that I don't even take the time to understand in the first place, and so this is a cool opportunity for myself to not simply react and take no more bullshit because I allow myself to NOT remain another zombie that in the end is only trying/attaining/attempting to survive in this world/reality from the starting-point that never had considered/taken into consideration what we must educate ourselves about.

When and as I see myself shoving pieces of information into and as my mind without understanding what it is I'm actually learning in the first place, I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back here - I now see, realize and understand that if we continuously remain not asking questions in this world/reality, then we remain complete idiots to what is happening in this physical reality, and so I allow myself to understand that its the starting-point of placing/projecting complete trust in this world-system that screws us over because we have taught ourselves to suppress/hide the fear that we experience and participate in about this world/reality - in this we have always been aware of the abuse because we even do it to ourselves and so we remove ourselves from this physical reality by/through placing/projecting ourselves into these boxes for ourselves to remain in LaLa Land because were too busy (apparently) THINKING - therefore - I commit myself to stand up within and as myself to take a moment to be/become self-aware of my breathing because I allow myself to not sit back within and as myself but to stand up because I do not accept or allow myself to enslave/limit myself to this physical reality because I have enslaved/limited myself to ever in-fact live - in this I would purposely/deliberately remain participating and experiencing myself as the thoughts I have to remain thinking/believing that this is all I am or will ever be - I commit myself to remain stable because I allow myself to actually think by/through not thinking because thinking is what allowed me to get into all this mess because all it takes is one thought to forevermore remain just another slave, and so I take this one breath because one breath can allow me to become self-aware of who I am/could be because I take the stance within and as myself that I CAN change myself to in-fact Re-Birth myself here in this life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe that thoughts are Life because I have bought into the idea/belief/perception/assumption that thoughts create Life - in this I have not considered/taken into consideration that thoughts have actually allowed me to create a Life that is a Lie because my entire LIfE has been a bucket full of lies, and so I have justified/excused myself to ever in-fact not take self-responsibility for the Lie I have been living - therefore - I would self-create the idea/belief/perception/assumption that Life can actually be lived when/as all what I'm doing is fueling/powering a Lie, and so I actually assume/perceive that Life can be lived when there are billions of people in this world/reality barely even living - within this my Lie has been conditioned to mere justifications/excuses to in-fact create Life on Earth to in-fact understand that as long as I'm deliberately/purposely suppressing/hiding from the fact that THINKING has allowed me to be/become a mere machine consumed by/through FEAR because its not a LifE I've been living - ONLY some fucked up version of LifE that only involved in complete petrification of my own FEAR, I mean, I don't know anything about life and what it means to be alive here in this moment - I don't understand what an actual opportunity it is to be here in this physical reality, and so my LifE has been filled with Lies to remain a Liar because I chose/made the decision to live in complete petrification of my own FEAR to not in-fact understand that I have the choice/decision to actually create Life on Earth by/through cooperating/working together as a group to actually LIVE for the first time ever - in this I now take my power back to understand that if I'm not doing this for myself then I MUST walk this process of Equality & Oneness for those that are actually suffering in this world because if that's not a motivational point to in-fact actually know that everything is just some fucked up Lie to never Live in the first place then I'm just abdicating my responsibility to what I knew I could've done in this Life if I actually chose/made the decision to in-fact Live for Life - to actually create Life.

When and as I see myself continuously lying to myself to create the Life that was nothing more and nothing less then a Lie, I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back here - I now see, realize and understand that my LIfE has been for nothing because I didn't in anyway create anything worthwhile for ALL that will actually support Life, and so I'm already dead because how can I even exist when/as I'm only continuing maintaining my self-interest that the LIE I have lived was actually Life in the first place? I commit myself to STOP lying to myself because being some self-interested asshole is not what I want to be and living a Life that never really existed in the first place is unacceptable - therefore - I allow myself to be alive for the first time because continuing my Life thinking not considering anyone or even myself for that matter is completely pointless and in the end it was suiting nothing but to continue this abuse in this physical reality to remain in complete petrification of my own FEAR - Is this really all what I am capable of being?

To Be Continued...
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