~Picture of me sitting at my computer, writing out points that I am not integrating to the best of my ability.I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the thought as image of me sitting at my computer, writing out points that I am not integrating to the best of my ability - to exist within and as myself, wherein I will in the moment actually purposely/deliberately write myself out from the starting-point of not integrating the writing as an actual self-realization, because I will during the moment I am writing and before hand I am about to write myself out, a little voice will pop up telling me that I am being dishonest and need to STOP, take a look at my starting-point and MOVE MYSELF, for real, in fact.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to purposely/deliberately shove aside the voice of reason - to look inside myself in terms of common-sense - where I will accept and allow myself to shove aside support from to take a step back and look at my starting point - without practically looking at why/how I am shoving aside common-sense in the first place - to no longer remain writing within and as a starting-point of self-dishonesty.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not able or worthy within and as writing myself to freedom to the best of my ability - wherein I've accepted and allowed myself to believe that I must write a certain way in order to get my point across - not seeing/realizing/understanding that as I am wanting/desiring to get my point across I end of somewhere in my mind, trying/attaining/attempting to reach this idea/belief about how incompetent/less than I am to never be able to possibly assist/support in the first place.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I MUST get a point across to someone or something outside myself within and as writing for people to be able to understand what I am pointing out in the first place - wherein I've accepted and allowed myself to believe that I MUST continuously find a magnificent point for someone to be able to understand what I am point out - not seeing/realizing/understanding that the point is here and there is nobody to prove myself to, in the first place - because all is HERE, and thus I allow myself to LIVE this to my fullest potential, NOT squandering each opportunity after another because I believe that I am not worthy or not able to even realize that everything is here in the first place.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to assume and perceive that I am too incompetent/less than to actually realize that everything is here, and thus there is nothing to point out in the first place - because I have lived my entire Life, assuming/perceiving that I am too something to actually LIVE to my fullest potential, and thus writing has become the exact same matter for myself - not seeing/realizing/understanding that one doesn't have to be something in order to apparently deserve realizing that everything is here, because that would just be a contradiction to what Equality & Oneness in fact means.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I since I am apparently something like being incompetent/less than, then I cannot realize how to LIVE to my fullest potential, like integrating the words that I am writing to my fullest potential - because I have mind-projected certain characteristics as deserving or non-deserving of actually being free to LIVE - not seeing/realizing/understanding that this is a confirmation how I have a limited perception about what freedom in fact means.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to mind-project certain assumptions about certain characteristics and within this give them certain values and definitions, that which would give someone a polarity mind-fuck of good/bad rewards that the person would acquire within and as their particular characteristic - not seeing/realizing/understanding the key word here, CHARACTER, thus - I now see, realize and understand that if I continue mind-projecting assumptions about what people will deserve, then I will spend my Life never in fact integrating anything remotely to my utmost potential - because at the end of the day it will be about which character would win/lose in the Game of Life - to continuously live a life full of survival and competition that was only about moving from one polarity to another.
When/as/if the thought as image of me sitting at my computer, writing out points that I am not integrating to the best of my ability -- I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back HERE - I realize that I am purposely/deliberately setting myself up to never in fact integrate the words as an actual practical-living solution, because I was too busy shoving the voice of reason telling me to take a step back and re-look at my starting-point - I commit myself to indeed stop, take a deep breath, and MOVE MYSELF, because I allow myself to SLOW DOWN - to not squander what is real and tangible to walk the talk.
When/as/if I believe that I am not able or worthy within and as writing myself to freedom -- I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back HERE - I realize that the key word here is FREEDOM, that which is including everyone here within and as this world/reality, including myself, to no longer squander a perfect structure that is writing because of belittling myself - I commit myself to become humble, and realize that everyONE here in this world/reality is one and equal, and thus writing is the same matter.
To Be Continued...
