Saturday, September 15, 2012

Day 54: Little Miss Judgmental

This is a continuation to Day 53: STOP JUDGING ME!
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to someone/something because I assume/perceive/think/believe that I am being dissected/analyzed/judged - in this I take what I am reacting too very personal, and so I self-judge myself to NOT apply the 4-count breath to realize that in the moment being dissected/analyzed/judged is NOT in anyway a bad/good thing to the point that I must take what someone/something tells me personally - within this I am also the one that is doing the exact same thing, because I am also dissecting/analyzing/judging what someone/something is doing unto myself to try/attempt/attain to make sense of all of it, and so I either mind-project positive energetic attachments and/or negative attachments unconsciously to give myself certain values and definitions - instead of realizing how much I am limiting/enslaving myself to/towards someone's apparently preconceived ideas/beliefs/assumptions/perceptions/judgments about myself, I've allowed myself to diminish and judge myself in the process because in the moment when/as I experience myself as being apparently dissected/analyzed/judged in very abusive manners (apparently) within and as that moment I capture the person/situation I am facing in the moment/chance/opportunity only within and as my mind, and so I only see by/through the eyes of my mind - to not in actuality get to the I/core/origin of who I am in that moment, because in that moment when/as I am capturing the person/situation I am also dissecting/analyzing/judging myself in the moment because all I see within and as that moment is all the possible case scenario's the person is dissecting/analyzing/judging to/towards myself, that I only see myself as a possible case scenario of ideas/beliefs/assumptions/perceptions/judgments to the point that I don't check myself in the moment to see who I am/have become within and as common-sense to apply in practical-application that I have been/become enslaved/limited to/towards something that doesn't even exist in the first place.

When and as I see myself react to someone/something because I assume/perceive/think/believe that I am being dissected/analyzed/judged, I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back here - I now see, realize and understand that I always have the choice/decision to actually make the choice/decision to investigate who I am/have become in the moment to apply the 4-count breath to take the stance within and as myself - "I do not accept myself to limit/enslave myself," "Till here no further," I realize that am absolutely no victim because I also had taken the choice/decision to dissect/analyze/judge myself and the person/situation that was reminding me how I allow myself to unconsciously carry positive and/or negative attachments to/towards certain points to the extent that I diminish/judge myself and the person/situation I am facing in the moment - I commit myself to in-fact investigate who I am/have become in the moment to realize that it was never about anyone/anything but who I am/could become in the moment/breath/chance/opportunity that I didn't allow myself to investigate within and as common-sense, and do I allow myself take each moment/chance/opportunity I face in complete gratitude - because each moment is a very cool moment/chance/opportunity to how I can actually breathe in the moment to take each moment as an actual chance/opportunity to Re-Veil who I am/have become to slowly but surely re-birth myself here within and as this physical reality to slowly but surely see who I am/could become.

I now see, realize and understand that if/when I am capturing a person/situation within and as my mind to only Re-Veil myself in complete repetition over and over again - from there perspective of veiling myself within and as the layers of the mind - because I am only blinding myself to see in relation to seeing what I actually want to see, and so I was only seeing what would allow my to deliberately/purposely not get to the I/core/origin of who I am/have become in that moment to continuously waste/wait/postpone my live to actually be lived - because I am only judging and diminishing myself in the moment to purpose/deliberately dissect/judge/analyze me Life away to slowly but surely DIS-Cover myself once and for all - to actually understand that I don't need/require to be a slave to other people's perceptions/assumptions/thoughts/emotions/feelings/backchats - because it is always a reflection of the I/core/origin of my eye to walk my eyes back to this physical reality to see once and for all - because tormenting myself within and as diminishment and judgment because of illusional ideas/beliefs is completely ridiculous, and so I allow myself to humble myself back to this physical reality to no longer Re-Veil myself to slowly but surely Re-Veal myself to myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to capture a person/situation in a moment simultaneously while I dissect/analyze/judge not only the person/situation I am facing in the moment, but also myself to the point that I completely diminish/judge myself to only see myself as the one point that is being Re-Vealed to myself in the moment - because in that moment I am not getting to the I/core/origin in any shape/form, Eye only see myself in this one moment I am seeing within and as my mind as though all I am/have ever been is in this moment - within this I have made the choice/decision to capture a person/situation within and as my mind to purposely/deliberately only see myself as this one point, because I allow myself to believe/deceive myself that all I am/have been is this one point and one moment - therefore - I allow myself to apply the 4-count breath to in actuality see myself in common-sense to realize all I am/have ever been is an idea/belief/assumption/judgment and no further self-judgment and diminishment is needed because I see that all what I must do is Re-Veal myself to myself in common-sense to actually DIS-COVER the Veil that has been pulled over my Eyes/I's to the point that I don't see anything within and as common-sense.


When and as I see myself capture a moment/person/situation while I simultaneously dissect/analyze/judge myself, I stop, I breathe and I bring myself back here - I now see, realize and understand that when/as I am capturing a person/situation in a moment I am not seeing anything because I am covering up/suppressing what is actually going on within and as the moment/person/situation - because I allowed the moment/person/situation be/become such a value and definition of who I am/could be to the point that I don't myself the choice/decision to apply the 4-count breath to get real within and as myself or touch my physical body to no longer capture moments where time stands steal, wherein if/when I was in actually facing a moment/person/situation in actual space/time here within and as this physical reality that wasn't in the mind I would be able to see the actuality of the I/core/origin to no longer see within and as the eyes of the mind. 


To Be Continued...

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